Surprising social media etiquette secrets.
(Long Island, N.Y.) I remember standing in line at Starbucks in Port Washington 8 years ago this week rolling my eyes as the customer ahead of us complained there was too much foam in her latte. Or maybe it wasn’t enough foam, come to think of it.
My co-worker and I rolled our eyes. A few days prior, close to 3,000 people died in the September 11 terrorist attack on the World Trade Center. This woman’s world was ending because her $4 coffee wasn’t prepared to her specifications?
I remember noticing in the days following September 11, people were (as a general rule) a little bit kinder, a little more patient, more polite. The woman we encountered was an anomaly, which is why it was so startling.
People “remembered” how to let other cars on the road merge into traffic, even during rush hour on the LIE. Shoppers let that harried mom behind them with only two items cut ahead in line. People opened doors, said please and thank you, treated others with kindness.
It’s appropriate, then, that September is National Courtesy Month. What better time to remember our manners than as we remember the greatest loss-of-life ever encountered on American soil?
But courtesy doesn’t begin and end in the brick-and-mortar world; it’s a crucial part of social media and online marketing. While the format and the delivery varies the basics don’t change.
I’m not talking about the obvious infractions of spammers and trolls, but the innocent faux pas most of us make from time to time. Follow these tips to use social media politely and effectively.
Know when it’s okay to sell. Could you imagine walking into your Lion’s Club meeting and announcing, “Have I got a free offer for you! Take a look at this brochure and sign up now! It’s free!” People do it online all the time – and not just spammers.
It’s okay to share information and hawk your services, but spend most of your time offering value to those who take the time to follow, friend or “link up” with you.
It’s not all about you. In fact, it’s not about you at all. There’s one on every forum and in almost everyone’s Twitter stream or Facebook feed. The person who barges into the room (virtually speaking), shares the mundane details of every second of her life, then rushes out, leaving nary a comment regarding other people’s posts or happenings. These people quickly find themselves a victim of the ignore button, leaving them to ramble all they want.
That’s the extreme case, but we all do this occasionally—maybe we have big, exciting news to share, or we’re in a hurry one morning. Just like at a real-life cocktail party, make sure you listen more than you talk on social media platforms. People will begin seeking you out.
In the absence of head nods and friendly filler, how do you show you’re listening? Comment on other people’s posts, comments and links.
Put a face to the name. People like to do business with people they know. Put a face to your name by including a nice, friendly picture of yourself in your profile.
Use a gimmick to spark conversations. Real-life networking experts suggest wearing a “conversation piece” to business and social gatherings – an interesting tie, a brooch, anything that invites people to comment. My standard bio pic shows me holding one of my cats. Many people have commented about the picture, opening the door to one-on-one conversation. Do you have an interesting hobby? A trademark hat, tie or other piece of clothing that is uniquely “You?” Include it in photos.
Also, look for conversation pieces on other people as an easy way to make a connection. You can also open a conversation with someone by making a personal comment (which requires a response) about a blog post, too.
Don’t be a “friendly stalker.” Cyber-stalking is a serious threat. If you are a victim, report it to Wired Safety (http://www.wiredsafety.com). I’m not talking about that, though.
Even completely sane people may inadvertently begin to “chase” someone they admire or would like to do business with. They show up everywhere their cyber-crush posts or visits, acting as a virtual “yes-man” in hopes of getting noticed.
Maybe you’ve fallen victim to this type of “harmless” stalking, or even done it yourself without realizing it. If there’s a person you admire or someone you feel is a perfect fit for your product or service, be straightforward. Start a conversation. That’s what social networking is about, after all – building relationships.
